First let's start on Friday. Actually it starts on Wednesday when I had to change my password on my work email. That made my phone connection stop working. I thought no big deal I can live without it for a couple of days. On Thursday I was told by SW to change Saturday plans untill kids get allergy test. OK but kind of last minute.
Friday pretty much quite got an message from facebook that allergy test will be Wed the 14 from FM.
Saturday pick up the kids. DH kind of in a mood. Seems like small things kids where doing got on his nerves. We tried to take them to the movies. Very expensive and then the three year old was just not interested in the movie. We left early. Six year old has emotional issue when we have to leave what ever he is enjoying but he is starting to work on that. I truly believe it is controllable. He is not going to control us. We took them out to eat no problems. Went to the playground everything was OK.
Sunday DH acted like we have the worst kids in the world. He never would say what they did wrong just that he thought they were out of control. After a good "discussion" I explained to him that he expects a three year old to act like a 50 year old and that is not going to happen. Also he is not going to hold me hostage with him wavering back and forth. We have come to far for him to have an attitude and I am not having it. We all made need time away from each other but right now we have a schedule we have to stick to and he does not have the luxury to decide to have an attitude against the schedule.
The weather was so beautiful on Sunday I called FM and asked to take kids by myself to the park. I picked them up and they were happy to go. They have the biggest smiles waiting for me. I took them to the park and they played for 2.5 hours. I offered them something to eat in the car and that is how I got them in the car without tears. Handed them a toy for behaving so well. The six year old gave me about five minutes of grief and then let it go. He gets better each time. Grab a couple of Happy Meals and all was well. FM and her mother were so happy that I could take them out. They praised me over and over for having the energy to take them out.
I went home and DH had a change of heart. There were brand new footballs, Basketballs, Helecopters and tow trucks for the kids. He said he tried to come to the park and find us but since it is a big park he didn't make it. He appologised and wanted all the details he missed.
I guess this is why God really wanted us to have two parents sometimes one has to hold everything while the other takes a break.
Now come Monday. I get to work and on my work email is a long conversation of email between the Social Workers, Attorney and Foster Mom about the allergy and dogs. The hurtful part is that FM smiled and hugged etc. in my face all weekend and was hitting me with missles by email. She made all these accusation about allergy reactions that Omar is having since he met the browns. How concern she is about allergies with the kids and their health. How the Bio mom likes to sue and the agency should be concern.
She just went on and on with the most riduculous statements ever. She sited that Omar's teacher called and said his eye was red ONCE. (Didn't mention that this happened two days after we had seen them - not an allergy) She sited that she has to clean Omar's face every day from green gook (I never heard of an allergy that strikes only at night) She wrote in all CAPS that maybe its a coincedence. She wrote a paragraph about her allergy to cats and how within moments she has problems. (I guess she didn't notice that she disproves her own point allergies are immediate and not just hitting later)
She wrote a paragraph on how the dog at the boys daycare doesn't really count for allergies because he is not the same room. (if you are allergic it is in the air) I am very sensitve about having a clean house so I was really hot at her accusations and she has never been to my house but one thing I know is that my house is cleaner than hers.
Her emailed was enough to kill our home visit untill the results are back.
I spoke to the SW that morning and she said at this point let's just get the test. I said OK. Through out the day FM sent more emails. Now she had to give the 3 year old his inhaler late in the night (there is no way that is related to the dogs) and Omar had to have his face washed again. AND???!!!
I did not respond.
Then I get a surprise shower (cupcakes, gift card and books) from the office. It was nice but frankly it was hard with the email war going on at that moment.
I come back to my desk and more emails. This time she is appologizing and hoping that everyone sees that she really supports Tony and I getting the children and only is looking out for the children's health.
I call the SW again and I said "Has she lost her mind". The SW concluded that FM is going through separation anxiety. Saying she must have started to realize that she has less than a month left. SW says maybe FM is reading over her other emails and realized how bad they sound and now has remorse.
I really wanted to treat her like family but she just made a Sharilyn move. Now she will get arm length treatment. Just let me know when and what I am to do.
My mom and my BFF are furious. Both having met the children. My BFF brought up a good point -how is it that the children only have reactions when she is alone with them. Even the SW wrote in the emails that the kids were very happy and had no problems when she observed our visit.
DH went home sick yesterday so he missed the emails and just got the synopsis. He is now upset that FM is acting like this but since he doesn't trust people he is not surprised.
Mentally I am exhausted. I am also so disappointed in her behavior. I am very grateful that the SW seems to recognize that FM has a problem. I understand her problem I wouldn't want to let the boys go either. I wish her well.
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