The weekend is over THANK YOU GOD!!!! These children are alot of work. Thursday was so bad with Tony taking a class and I had to take the kids to the Omar's doctors appointment. I so did not want to come home on Friday after work. Friday started off bad with Joseph hitting and kicking. Tony went to get a hair cut and seem to take forever to come home. BJ was cutting up bad. He mimicks Joseph and that is not a good thing. Joseph had scratch my throat and hit and kicked me so much on Friday that I was in tears when Tony came home. Tony went down the street were Officer Robinson was taking a break and brought him back. Officer Robinson came in the house and said which one of you is Joseph. Then took him downstairs and talked to him about where they take bad boys and how he would come back to get him if he hit mommy or daddy again. Well guess what the hitting stopped. There are moments when Joseph thinks about it but we remind him and he straigtens up. Now that doesnt mean that Joseph doesn't act up but he doesn't hit. Now Omar on the other hand seems to want to walk on the wild side lately. The kids do so much better when they are separate. BJ did stay dry most of the day. Except for when we were in the car and I just couldn't get him to a bathroom in time. He did pretty good.

CFSA Sucks

On Tuesday we had a visit with the social worker. The kids were playing in and out on the deck. The child 2 eventually started in on daily tantrum. He showed the social worker his full rhem. He hit me kick me threw pillows and the same to DH. The social worker began talking to me about getting #2 services and then she mentioned that we should seriously think about taking up FM on the offer to adopt #2. She told me to call FM to come and get #2 now. To send an email in the morning to make it official that we should be working toward that. I cried all night. and the next day but kept telling myself that I was doing what was best for #2. Social Worker even called the next morning saying my letter was not strong enough. Later I got a call from Social Worker's Supervisor telling me that we had not tried long enough. That we had abandonded #2. It was so confusing that SW never mentioned that she was the one who told me to do this. Through with CFSA will just follow directions. Can't wait for the finaly adoption.

OK - What is going on in my mouth. I wake up every morning swollen. Now I feel something comming out and what I can catch looks greenish. I don't have time for my mouth to act up. I have three little boys. Took BJ to Pre school Orientation and he loved it but we have to get the potty training together for real. Foster MOM is back asking for Joe. It is a lot pressure. If she ask at the right moment HERE will be my answer. Mostly I hurt when she ask. It's like she is saying I can't handle my own child. I only want what is best for him and many times I doubt that the answer is me.

Tired but not sleepy

I am worn out but not really sleepy. The kids are alot of work. We are moving the whole time. The kids get so excited when we come into new places but I hope they calm down soon.

Yesterday also seem to be a dump on Step day. My co-worker told me I looked bad. My mom told me my house smells like dog urine. I didn't get a good nights sleep at all. Face is more sore today.

Day two of work

I am back at work and about to fall completely out. Don't think I can make it. Mostly because I have not eatten. I am not trying to starve but between no time I have no appitite and my mouth reminds me that it is just not ready. So if I can't slurp it down I am doing without.

The kid's seem to be doing well. In the last 24 hours I have had a half a can of spaghettio's. I won't be any good to anyone if I don't take care of myself. I need to find some solution.

One of my co-workers told me my hair didn't look good. I have been feeling bad evey since. I guess I can put a little more effort into my hair. I didn't think I looked that bad.

Sick of all these appointments though. Everytime I look around someone is making an appointmen and then canseling. We have one today that I am taking the kids to just to make sure that we get to leave on time.

I never thought I would be this busy.

Smile for the Camera

Everyday we learn a new trick to get us through the day. B5's teachers told us to video him when he misbehaves to help us with getting him on track. Everytime we pull out the camera he snapps out of the bad behavior and becomes the most perfect angel you will ever meet.

now we walk around with camera's. His behavior has gotten so much better. B6 is having a little trouble going to bed. Wants to just watch TV. No TV tonight.

Well time to run a few errands before I pick the boys up for the day.

They are so here!!!!

The boys came to stay on Wed. I have never been so tired in my life. The level of noise has gone from 2 - 40. Yesterday was hard. We had to really do time out with all of them mostly Joseph. Placing him back and forth on the carpet for over 45 minutes. The others tried us but by then we were experts after JO. We did well eventually. Today was just busy but the behavior was so much better. I can't wait for school to start Tuesday. I might get them there an hour early LOL!!!

Where's the excitement

I expected that I would be more excited and actually today I am more sad than usual. There is alot going on around me. Mom and Dad financially are drowning. Tony and I are doing our best to help them but that also takes away from the possibilty of having our biological baby. Also my Aunt is not doing well. I want to go but we can't leave. I miss my family. I guess that is also sad. I don't feel my family around me and I am going to be a mommy tomorow. My mom didn't even remember.

The Fm is still slow with getting the clothes together. I am not going to ask any more. I am just going to buy new clothes. Slowly but surely I will bring it together.